Wednesday, May 25, 2011

keep portland beered

taken @ trader joe's in portland

another random thing about me- i like posting pictures of "awesome bumper stickers" on my facebook page. sometimes when i'm posting, it actually feels like there there is a legit contest going on and i'm announcing the winner. but there isn't. i'm the only judge and the contest takes place whenever i feel like it. ha! i've seen plenty of "keep portland weird" bumper stickers, but never "keep portland beered" which is TOTALLY portland. i'm pretty sure micro brews spill out of beer fountains (formerly known as water fountains) around the city. although i haven't had a sip for almost a month, micros are one of my favorite beverages and what makes it hard to think of leaving the Pacific NW ;)
ok, next up- Love your Farmer! i felt all warm and fuzzy when i read this and thought about running back to the farmer's market to hug all the farmers there...it's true. thank you to all the farmers who continue to tackle a profession that is not always glamorous or predictable...i cannot thank you enough for doing what you do so that i can eat the fruit of your labor. muchas gracias. 
last but most certainly not least-FOOD FIGHT, two words that i have not used together in a long time.and why not?! because i've grown too old to have fun? surely not! when i was in high school i worked at dairy queen. during the end of an extremely slow night during the winter, we managed to have a full on food fight. it started out as an eating contest but progressed into a ketchup/mustard/whip cream/relish/chocolate graffiti session. we were all covered in the worst combinations you could dream of. who wants to smell pickles and chocolate? or ketchup and whip cream? gross! anyway, this car was loaded with awesomeness and completely deserves my totally fictitious award. congratulations!

to comment or not to comment...

i have been reading some blogs lately that receive hundreds of comments in response to the blogger's question
soo many comments-image found on web


then there are other blogs--that receive few, if any comments- even when a question is asked...
shhhh-no comments please :) (image found on web)


so...out of random curiosity, i wondered what makes you decide to comment or not in regards to blogs you read? 

Monday, May 23, 2011

audrey hepburn & a tulip

found this sweet little tulip and had to take a picture


I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.


it's monday and since i've been feeling very run down lately...i thought a mood brightener might be nice. i'm admittedly NOT a pink girl...even though i think there are shades that are pleasant enough...like blush and bashful (steel magnolias) but this tulip was quite cute just sitting there all pink and innocent. i agree with audrey, happy girls are the prettiest...and maybe the same can be true for tulips. this little number looked awfully happy sitting in the sun!


happy monday everyone! 

Sunday, May 22, 2011

mountain goat gallop half marathon race review











i never study up on the runs that i do...instead i tell myself that they will be 13.1 miles of fun-that's all you need to know, right? the website did mention hills and few-if any-spectators. for some reason i stress over how my socks feel-they have to be just right- but hills and no one watching didn't worry me. not like i said YAY, can't wait...but sometimes you have to roll with the punches. 
the one thing that i was afraid of was feeling like i did after the heart breaker half in february. that was awful-- putting it lightly.


the night before i stayed at my friend's place in wilsonville since it was closer to the start. where is mollala, oregon anyway?! ha ha


sadly, during my drive, i was informed my brother's dog, moto, had passed away. this sent me into functional hysteria. somehow i managed to get to my final destination although it's all very blurry. maybe they should do a "don't get emotional and drive" campaign to go along with "don't drink and drive". 


that night i managed to get a few hours of sorta shut eye. why sorta? well, because my eyes were so swollen from crying i'm fairly certain they never officially shut. i didn't want to run the next morning. thankfully my body ignored my brain and got in the car. first i listened to music and then didn't. nothing felt 'right'. when i arrived it looked like there might be 50 people running....oh great, i thought. what did i get myself into??? once inside, i was able to get my bib and t-shirt which was orange, with a mountain goat on it. pretty cool. it was then obvious that there would be more runners. phew!
tears fell as they pleased. as i was lacing my shoes this guy nearby started talking to his buddy. i hear him ask "you know what i love about running events?" "what's that?" his buddy replied. "all the cute girls" i didn't look up because clearly he could not be talking about me and my beach ball sized swollen eyes and blotchy face. he tapped me on my shoulder and i looked up-realizing he was in fact directing the comment at me. i said, oh this?-hardly. he responded..."you are gorgeous...hang in there."
he didn't know what was going on but clearly saw my outward cry to the world that all was not well...and instead of avoiding and/or interrogating me...he simply reached out and gave what i have started to coin as the "stranger hug" we don't just hug random people but through our kind gestures and words...it feels like we can essentially "hug" a stranger. (maybe i will do a post about this) he wasn't trying to flirt---if anything it felt more like he knew it might feel good to hear something nice. it was kind of him. 


anyway, we were given a paper grocery bag with instructions to write our bib # on the bag. we would take it with us to the starting line location to use as a bag check. the volunteers would then load up the empty bus with our bags and bring them back to the finish. it was a really great idea. i don't know that i've ever done an event with so few participants but it was fun to walk to the starting line-not sure i was going in the right direction. it had a completely home grown feeling. like we were pioneers....  my eugene crossfit shirt that says "we train so we don't suck at life" on the back was the "chosen" tee for the run. i like this shirt a lot. as we walked to the starting line a guy noticed my shirt and said to his friends, ah, she's one of those crazy crossfitters. hmmm, i suppose that is true...
there was no chip or clock at the start. the guy just said-GO-- that was the start. earlier that morning i decided to run in honor of mr. moto...since i remembered my marathon in alaska...running in honor of my aunt. it makes the miles go by faster when you have something else to focus on. the rain kept coming. it was a curtain of drizzle. my awesome 100% cotton t-shirt was soaked by mile 3 and i felt like i was stuck in a never ending shower...with cold water. luckily i warmed up and enjoyed the run for the most part. there were hills. YES THERE WERE. that was a true statement although i went at them with all i had and managed to do ok. on the climb up...the rain would hit at an angle that made me feel like i couldn't breathe. that was weird. my earphones were lame  so when i would pass someone...or maybe just that one person...or i was passed (more likely) people would say...great song. well thank you...if you want to stick around we could maybe turn this into a mountain goat dance party. ha ha!
moto was on my mind a lot and i found myself crying often. the rain washed over my tears like a wave covering the sand to return to the ocean. i use my garmin for distance measurement mainly. in the initial miles i use it to remind me to gauge my pace since adrenaline is usually the culprit for runners going out too fast. otherwise i try to make sense of it all but doing math while i run or playing with my watch is annoying so i just look at the miles and hope they quickly melt away. 
it was fun to see a part of oregon i've never seen before. not like it's drastically different but i love running along cow filled pastures and seeing horses run along the fence. it felt peaceful. the lack of spectators didn't really bother me--and i think it fit the nature of the task at hand. definitely a run that makes you dig deep...mostly on your own. plus,given my emotional state...the course gave me the space i felt like i needed...
i finished just under 3 minutes over my PR...which i felt great about given the difficulty of the course. i'm definitely going to run it next year and am still focused on obtaining my goal of running a 1:45 half before the year ends. 




speaking of...i'm thinking of finishing my 12th half in vegas since i've never been. who has been to vegas and what did you think? is it one of those things you need to do at least once in your life? let me know!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

5k Love updates!

hey everyone! the 2nd annual 5k love will be here in just about 3 months. i can hardly believe it. this event means soo much to me for soo many reasons. there are a few changes this year. i figured, since the 5k was such  a great time, why not double the fun and include a 10k option. the t shirts are currently being designed and the website re-designed. the next big step is online registration. i've lost sleep trying to figure out how to do this without using a provider that charges steep fees for their services. ultimately, online registration is fast and effective and gives you true visibility as to "actual" participants. 
last year, it was a donation based entry fee--give what you can. and i LOVE that concept...although there are hidden costs involved to make events like this happen. the city requires permits, for example. who knew that would cost $75? not sure how they determine fees...wonder what fees are like in big cities. i'm sure i will find out some day ;) 
the main thing we need right now is word of mouth. people talking about the event and directing people to check out our site (to be updated soon)


congenital heart defects affect everyone and anyone...and i am soo proud to have created an event to not only honor the life of a little one who left his family FAR TOO SOON, but to bring awareness for the families and individuals who deal with these defects daily--and some will for the rest of their lives. 


it really was a magical day last year and i am extremely excited to do it all again :)


**please like 5k Love on Facebook...look to the right hand side of the blog to do so

Friday, May 20, 2011

pop art with a shopping cart






"The creative mind plays with the objects it loves."
 Carl Jung




a random tid bit about me...i like taking pictures of shopping carts i find in random spots. this one was on the sidewalk under a gorgeous blossom filled tree while running in portland last week. not sure what the appeal is about shopping carts in unusual places...but that's the cool thing about "random" things we love. we don't have to justify it! 
hope your day is dandy!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

say it like it is

dear whiny emilee. it's time to wake up and freakin' concentrate. while at work, you constantly stare at the clock, hoping that it's time to give your two week notice. you whine to friends about being unhappy and counsel those who offer the same confession to push forward because they totally deserve to do something they love. i get that life isn't just a snap of the finger and poof--but i have always been willing to work hard. i LOVE to work. i work as much as i can most days...that's not the problem. the problem is i do this roller-coaster thought process. one minute i can do anything i put my mind to...the next minute i feel overwhelmingly inadequate...  this cycle is vicious and mean and i am tired...


 i found this quote and think it's great...

"We shall never have more time. We have, and have always had, all the time there is. No object is served in waiting until next week or even until to-morrow. Keep going day in and out. Concentrate on something useful. Having decided to achieve a task, achieve it at all costs." Arnold Bennett


so... i am challenging myself-whether it's a small whisper or a ferocious roar -to focus on finding my career. it is the task i want to achieve and so i will keep going-day in and out...until i achieve it. even if i feel inadequate or the voice of doubt continues to talk... in fact...maybe it's TIME to kick that voice's ass... i mean, what object is served in waiting until next week or even tomorrow? maybe that voice needs to meet me by the bike racks tonight at the gym? ;)

Monday, May 9, 2011

mr moto...

this weekend i went to check out one of my favorite websites of all time...mainly because it contains some of my favorite pictures of all time www.visualpause.com. andy is such a talented photographer. i haven't been able to visit his site as often lately, so when i saw the following two photos posted, my heart wept. there was my fury nephew moto...and his sweet, sweet face that was always happy to see you. andy does a wonderful job capturing the spirit of whatever is in front of the lens...and these photos are absolute proof. 

the reality of it all still pulls at my heart strings. i broke down in tears when i first saw the photos...and am doing so now. i think that's just how it will be... some days i am more accepting of reality than others...it's never easy to lose the physical presence of someone or something--especially those that were always willing to love you unconditionally... i mean, how often do you truly experience that kind of love? fortunately, he will always be with us...in spirit
image courtesy of visualpause.com 


"An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language." ~Martin Buber

moto just wanted to be close to you (image courtesy of visualpause.com)

"I talk to him when I'm lonesome like; and I'm sure he understands.  When he looks at me so attentively, and gently licks my hands; then he rubs his nose on my tailored clothes, but I never say naught thereat.  For the good Lord knows I can buy more clothes, but never a friend like that."  ~W. Dayton Wedgefarth


Friday, May 6, 2011

growth


image found on web


 I do not think one can explain growth. It is silent and subtle. One does not keep digging up a plant to see how it grows.



i like this quote. it reminds me of the phrase that goes something like "when you are too close to something, you can't see the bigger picture..." 
even though i cannot see the root system, i have no doubt that the emotional growing (and healing) is happening...yes, i am still triggered by certain situations, people, mirrors, or the negative self talk, but i recognize a greater sense of awareness. i am able to let something go far easier than before. i appreciate the simple fact that what hurts most is often someone else's business--which is a wonderful reminder to not expend energy trying to "figure it out"--it doesn't help ME grow.
of course i still get frustrated, but i refuse to give up...i'm going to keep growing until the roots are long enough to strangle the damn self criticizing voice that is just becoming more...and more...annoying!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

cinco de mayo

this cute little guy has appeared on my blog before. may or may not have been a year ago :) ...but anyway, just wanted to say happy cinco de mayo everyone. i'm heading to portland to see joe purdy play at the doug fir. i'm really excited!







Wednesday, May 4, 2011

choose and go forth...


negative of a picture i took w/ my phone last weekend


"When you have chosen your part, abide by it, and do not weakly try to reconcile yourself with the world."

 Ralph Waldo Emerson

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

shitbegone...

image found on web

while staples might have the easy button, i'm thinking i could use a roll of this. not for literal reasons, actually. although it's always nice to have something on hand for emergency purposes. the kind of sh*t i am talking about is the kind that looks like your entire travel mug full of tea spilling onto your smart phone--that is sadly not smart enough to know how to swim. yeah, always a good way to start out a monday. would have been nice to have sh*tbegone to help soak up the lake that was my desk. 
my dear friend is a teacher who works with underprivileged youth ranging from 6th-9th graders. apparently they thought it would be a real hoot to crush up candy to make it look like cocaine and then snort it. she happened to walk in just as they were freaking out from the burning sensation their noses were experiencing. she was appalled and broken hearted. how do you discipline that kind of behavior without letting your fear of what this might mean overtake you.  she was unable to fully understand what would bring her students, kids she cares for deeply, to do such a thing. pretty sure she could have used some sh*tbegone to act as kleenex since they clearly had to blow the sugar out of their noses....on their way to the principal's office. 
sometimes, it is really-really-REALLY hard not to complain about little things, like stubbing your toe, or hitting your nose with the bar as you do a thruster at the gym...sometimes it is even hard not to complain about how much your job stinks....(yeah, i am terribly good at complaining about this)
i think the hardest part is it's always a choice--we get to choose how we handle those situations. last night, i was a total baby during the workout. i kept wanting to throw a temper tantrum. funny enough, it was one specific move that made me see red. and i realize that anything that causes that kind of response in me is more like a gift. it's an opportunity to tame the dragon that is my negative self talk. 
although, negative self talk might require BULLsh*tbegone. because that is what it really is, right?
come to think of it, BULLsh*tbegone might be extremely beneficial in the dating world. wouldn't it be nice if you could go out on a date, and pull bullsh*tbegone out like a police badge, or kryptonite and immediately cause the other person to refrain from feeding you any lines? ah, yes...that would be most excellent.