growth

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 I do not think one can explain growth. It is silent and subtle. One does not keep digging up a plant to see how it grows.

Emily Carr

i like this quote. it reminds me of the phrase that goes something like "when you are too close to something, you can't see the bigger picture..." 

even though i cannot see the root system, i have no doubt that the emotional growing (and healing) is happening...yes, i am still triggered by certain situations, people, mirrors, or the negative self talk, but i recognize a greater sense of awareness. i am able to let something go far easier than before. i appreciate the simple fact that what hurts most is often someone else's business--which is a wonderful reminder to not expend energy trying to "figure it out"--it doesn't help ME grow.
of course i still get frustrated, but i refuse to give up...i'm going to keep growing until the roots are long enough to strangle the damn self criticizing voice that is just becoming more...and more...annoying!